Sunday, July 13, 2008

A question for Brad Pitt

So Brad, are they real?

I ain't buying it any more than Surry Cruise. You left Jennifer Aniston for that tattooed hag?

It's hard to fool El Chavismo.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

I just had the coolest thought!

So I just got back from a private screening of the movie Mongol, party members and dedicated revolutionaries only. It was no 300, but it was still awesome, and yall should all see it.

It's about Genghis Khan, or Temudjin, as his close personal friends used to call him back in the day. Did you know that Genghis Khan avenged his father's murderer, just like the Outlaw Josey Wales? Now you do!

Anyway, my point is that wouldn't it be awesome if Genghis Khan had had a helicopter? It would be so cool. He'd be dropping the BOMB on those imperialists with his helicopterized Mongol horde.

And that's just what El Chavismo is going to do to the yankee George Bush when he brings his mercenaries into the jungle down here. You here me talking hillbilly boy? I'm gonna get MONGOL on your ass!!!

El Chavismo on Facebook?

So I'm sitting around the presidential palace this morning, watching CNN, and they had this show on this new thing called social networking. They say it's all the rage with the youth of the world, and El Chavismo is all about connecting with the young, because they're the future workers of the world.

And then it hit me. Could I have a future in this social networking scene? Is there room for me with these new technologies? Hell yeah babies.

And it's easy. Every Bolivarian revolutionary should try it. I hooked up with my friends, and even whipped this gringo at a game of scrabble. El Chavismo is a mean scrabble player, even in in English.

Now to look up Fidel and Raul.

Friday, July 11, 2008

This is AWESOME!

So my friend Karen Jean, who's like this strong black senorita, has this knack for meeting Hollywood stars. El Chavismo gives her much respect, because she's met some of the all time greats, people like Dirk Benedict and Lorne Green.

So you'll never guess who she met last week. NEVER!

SEE! El Chavismo will give you a hint. KEVIN COSTNER! That's right. Star of Dances With Wolves and The Postman. Check it out!

She gets around, my friend Karen Jean. You'll never guess who else she met. Go ahead - guess!

That's right. Parker Stevenson - star of the HARDY BOYS MYSTERIES! Check it out!

Karen Jean is AWESOME!

Gimme an O!

Gimme a B!

Gimme an A!

Gimme an M!

Gimme another A!


Yes we can!

Oh Shit

Where to start?

I know when I started this blog two years ago that all yall were counting on regular updates from El Chavismo, but what what can I say? I've been BUSY, ok? Jetsetting around the globe, seeing international movie stars, kicking it with Oliver Stone, you know how it is. And that's just the WORK, baby.

The F-dog has gone into a bit of a tailspin, and that's been weighing heavily on my mind, cause yall know what inspiration Fidel's always been to me. I'm sure Raul will pull Cuba out of its troubles, and keep up the good fight, but he's not the man his brother is and was. Yall didn't hear that from me, k? ;)

So between fighting for new counterterrorist laws, and expanding the welfare of the people, and supporting democracy in Colombia (Alvaro, you can SUCK MY FAT ONE!), it's been a hot and thirsty day in Caracas. HEY KOOL-AID!

I promise to keep this blog updated more regularyl in the future, but it's all kool, and we always be kool. As Pac would have said, you know dat.

Pac lives!

El Chavismo.